trace_of_scarlet

Backdated (i.e. typed in MS Word) because my father for some reason decided to switch the wifi off before I could get to it.

Am pretty! Have pretty hair still, and had pretty makeup and pretty jewellery and gorgeous dress. Being chief bridesmaid odd job, but good fun. Alas, will not have pretty (professionally done! JOY) hair (with peekaboo fringe! Rather like, but not for allthetime) much longer, as need to take pins out and, y’know, actually sleep now. Am impressed with the way hairstyle (a little bit curled, a little bit sleek, more than a little bit PRETTY) has held out, although it was probably helped by the half a can of hairspray the hairstylist used on it. And pins.

Am pretty drunk – you would not believe the number of typos I’m making typing this. Thank God for spellcheck. Would leave typos as they are, but am not too drunk to notb notice the red lines and retype until I get the right thing.

Mmmm, free bar. Drank a ridiculous amount of Pimms (five or six glasses in half an hour), rather a lot of Jack Daniel’s and lemonade (er, three or four doubles? Ish), one Jack Daniel’s and coke (dunno if double or not – it was bought for me so I necked it, as you do) and three double Southern Comforts and lemonades (they taste like Refreshers!). Mmm.

Well. Was free bar. Would have been rude not to indulge, amIrite? More corridors should have bars in them.

I kissed a boy and I liked it. Dunno what’ll happen there, but am not overly bothered either way. Shall see.

Definitely drunk. My brain is intriguingly fuzzy and my vision weird. My balance and movement even weirder, and by my standards that’s saying something. Sleeping now. Au revoir pretty hair. D: (Though I might leave the pins in and see if I can sleep with it that way.)

Night!

It is my birthday tomorrow. I shall be seventeen. *le squee* And Circe has posted on my birthday even though it is not my birthday here yet. *le pout* The Lost episode on my birthday is to be the one that centres on Charlie. I feel this is a highly fitting birthday present from Channel Four- because yum, Dominic Monaghan.

I like Sixth Form, I think. Especially the free lessons. We generally seem to be having a good time, and there don't appear to be any major falling-outs. Yet. Which is probably something of a record. Quite a bit of homework, though- not lots of pieces of homework, but lots of work to do for each piece, if you see what I mean. I like English lots. I like History, but they are trying to make me switch classes and This I Will Not Do, goddammit. French would be more fun if I was in the other class- I kinda hate most of the people in mine. I like Biology when Dr J is teaching, but I never understand anything when Mr W is. Which is Teh Suck. I think I may swap it for Art.

There is a Boy, but I don't think he knows that he is The Boy. Except sometimes I think that maybe he thinks I am The Girl, but I'm not sure because I suck at That Sort Of Thing (is he being sweet just because he's sweet, or because he's sweet and likes me?). And I lack the courage to ask him out, though I almost asked him out before the summer holidays started. Maybe tomorrow, then when if he says no I shall be having many things to cheer me up, by the sounds of it. Nobody else knows who The Boy is. I have got muchmuch better at keeping secrets recently. *is smug*

Why am I typing strangely? It does amuse me, though. I feel I sound a little like Luna Lovegood.

I finally managed to draw something halfway decent today. I have been unable to draw anything I remotely like since school finished. *shrug* Perhaps I only draw well when I am tired, or not supposed to, or both.

Ah well. Am tired. To bath, and to bed. Night.

ETA: I adore diantha_malfoy and foxglove_icons. That is all.

To Come And Set Me Free- it’s pretty old, but I still like it. It is also an example of the most blatant personal denial you may ever be fated to set eyes on.
I don’t wanna be no Cinderella
Sitting in a dark cold dusty cellar
Waiting for somebody
To come and set me free

‘Cause Cindy’s pretty but she’s so slight
That princess will never learn to fight
So she’s gotta have somebody
To come and set her free

I don’t wanna be no beauty waiting
I can do my own dragon slaying
I don’t need nobody
To come and set me free

I don’t wanna be some pretty princess
With a prince on hand and a flowing dress
‘Cause I don’t want somebody
To come and set me free

I ain’t gonna depend on someone else
I know what to do, I’ll rescue myself
I don’t have to have nobody
To come and set me free

Cinderella, Snow White, Aurora, Belle,
They might be pretty but they’re fragile as shells,
None of them have ever known how to play hell,
So I guess I’ll stick with Mulan and Tinkerbell
Yeah, yeah, yeah, ‘cause:

I don’t wanna have no-one to take care
I might be a girl but I don’t fight fair
I’ll be the somebody
Who comes to set me free
I ain’t gonna be the new Snow White
I don’t need someone to help me sleep at night
Because my knight in armour
On a pure white charger
Is me
And that’s the way it has to be

Lost In Space- not so old as Cinderella, but a good few months old. A classic example of why you should never write songs and/or poetry while listening to rock music: it may come out well, but it will never be happy.
Dying silently inside
Dying late into the night
I’m sobbing invisible tears
I’m screaming but no-one hears

Because you were and then you weren’t
You put your arms around me
But then you left me, lost me somewhere:

I’m lost in space
I can’t breathe and I can’t scream
Without a trace
I can’t think so I can’t leave
I know this place
Black infinity deep inside my dream

So hopeless
So helpless
There is nothing I can do
I’m slumping
Then flying
Lost in hopeless dreams of you

Flying screaming through the night
Flying, dreaming deep inside
Invincible without my fears
In my dreams the pain can’t sear

Because there I see you, you always are
There your arms are still around me
And you never leave me, I’m lost in my dreams there:

I’m lost in space
I can’t breathe and I can’t scream
Without a trace
I’ve forgotten how to leave
I know this place:
My only refuge, deep inside my dream

Such sweetness
Such lightness
There is nothing I can do
I’m crying
Then flying
Lost in dreams that won’t come true

Lying wide-eyed late into the night
Your face alone in my sight
I’m laughing in my nightmares
I’m lost in a dream that scares

I need to see you, please where have you gone?
I need your arms around me, desperately
Why have you left me, lost my dreams there:

I’m lost in space
I can’t breathe and I can’t scream
Without a trace
I’ll fade away, no I don’t want to leave
I know this place
Want to stay here always, cocooned by my dream

So out of control
Such a lost soul
I don’t want a rescue
No more crying
Just flying
And still there’s nothing I can do:

I’m lost in space
I can’t breathe and I can’t scream
Without a trace
I’ve forgotten how to leave
I know this place:
My only refuge, deep inside my dream

You never come, I’m undone:

Lost in space
Screaming and screaming,
Never seeming to find my place
Shifting and drifting
On into the void
Forever and ever, forever and ever now
Your love’s a never, I’ll love you forever anyhow
‘Cause I’m still lost…
Lost in space…